Bath time … for Mama

My maternal grandmother may have driven her daughters a bit nuts with her vanity, but she never had a hair out of place, her lips were expertly drawn, and her skin was always powdered to perfection. Her beauty was her pride and driving force as she raised and educated five children in post Korean-War Seoul -- all the while, sewing and knitting their clothes by hand. In my grandmother's fashion, no matter what happens with A in the morning, I put myself together in one way or another before I head out the door. But just because you start the day "fresh off the shelf" doesn't mean you're going to come home looking or feeling that way. And that's when you indulge in a long, warm, bath.

I grew up traveling and spending a lot of time in Japan and Korea where the bath/spa culture is huge and historic. Soaking and/or immersing yourself in very hot water for long periods is considered something that should be done if not daily (Japan), then at least weekly (Korea). The hot bath, which customarily you would do in the evening, is where you 'remove the day,' cleanse yourself of toxins, and stimulate blood flow.

A relaxing soak of at least 15-20 minutes is extraordinarily restorative. We spend so much time bathing our kids and letting them have fun in the tub that it's easy to overlook the importance of being in there yourself. Set it up as your at-home spa treatment -- schedule it like you would a massage. Make sure you won't have any interruptions: turn your phone off, have the kids in bed. Then, draw your bath to a temperature of your liking. You can add a couple of drops of bath oil (like Neutrogena Body Oil , $11, or Bamford Baby & Massage Oil, $56) to help seal the moisture into your skin. But, I usually prefer plain hot water, which in and of itself will hydrate skin, not to mention soothe any aching or tense areas of your body.

Give yourself time to decompress, and relish in the tranquility.

Lovely Bath 1-2-3:

1) If you prefer a bubbly soak, I always enjoy the aroma of Philip B. bath products. Try his Thai Tea Mind & Body Wash ($35: 12 oz.).


2) Candles do add a luxe element to a home bath. Here is a scented candle set by Kai Fragrance ($40), that reminds me of Hawaiian Ginger leis.


3) One of my new, favorite bath towels is the traditional Turkish Pestemal ($25). It's lightweight -- the baby's heavy enough -- absorbent, and dries quickly.

-- N.C.

Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com.

Surviving the Home Haircut

During my twenties, I cut my hair constantly. I experimented with layers, bangs, different lengths -- you name it. Maybe it stemmed from my love of scissors, which I get from my mother. She had a pair of stainless steel sewing Singer's, which now are as old as me, and they still cut through jeans like a knife through butter. As a child, the clicking sound they made was sensational -- the undulating rhythm of creativity at work.  When A was born I vowed not to touch her hair for several years. Her hair was precious in a way mine had never been. But then during a painful, cry-filled, teething day, A started yanking furiously at her hair as it fell uncomfortably in her eyes. The time had come for her first haircut.

I took a couple of deep breaths before I started, and though I merely trimmed the front, I felt a pang of, strangely, guilt? For fifteen and a half months these loving locks had grown with my little girl.  In the end, A was so relieved to have the hair out of her face that amidst the swollen gums she quieted down. I'd helped her cope. And when I took a step back, I saw that the new fringe was a bit Betty Page!

Since then, I've given her a full-on haircut, and experienced none of the emotions I originally had. It was easy. I realized that children need haircuts regularly to maintain healthy hair, just as adults do. It rejuvenates hair growth by alleviating some of the weight. And sure a little kid's ends don't endure the same amount, or kind, of wear and tear that an adult's does, but the ends are the oldest area of every strand. And with A's curly hair, it was refreshing to see how much more her ringlets bounced and spiraled naturally with less weight.

The trick to a successful, at-home haircut is to have a good pair of scissors. Just like with food prep where you're less likely to cut yourself with a sharper knife, your child's hair will be cut more safely and efficiently with a solid pair of hair-cutting shears. Our last haircut took all of ten minutes. I didn't have a smock so I took a small garbage bag and cut out three holes: one at the bottom seam for her head, and then two at the side seams for her arms. You can place a cotton bib underneath the smock for added protection from the falling locks. A went into the high chair, Sesame Street was turned on, and I gave her a snack cup.

With A's curls, my plan of attack was to go around her in a circle and take a 1/2-inch off as evenly as possible. And with curlier hair, remember that when it's wet it appears longer than it is, so be careful not to take off more than you'd like. After spraying her hair with water, I combed it out, removing all the tangles. Then, using the comb to grab one-inch sections of hair from the roots (working around her head in a downward spiral from the crown), I would slide the sections through the index and third fingers of my left hand (I'm a rightie), stopping just short of a 1/2-inch from the ends. At that point I would snip with the scissors in my right hand. I took some photographs with A's doll to illustrate.

While cutting, your fingers should always be there in between the scissors and your child as a safety. You can still manage even lines while using your fingers to hold the hair against their neck, forehead, ear, etc. If you're having trouble keeping your child still -- bangs can be particularly challenging -- you can always try when they're asleep, and/or have a friend/husband/partner help you hold their head. One trick I've used for both my fringe and A's is to cut at an angle (see photo) as you go across. This will give you a softer, easier to cut, line.


Pro Cut 1-2-3:

1) I love these scissors by Diane Professional ($65). They saw me through some of my own at-home haircuts and now they're navigating A's.

2) A spray bottle ($3) filled with water is useful not only for haircuts but for daily styling and detangling. Our spray bottle was actually what kept A still for most of her last haircut. She kept spraying her face with it, exclaiming, "OOOH!"

3) The comb I use for A is this Mason Pearson ($26) one. It is a great detangler for both straight hair like mine or curlier hair like hers.

--N.C.



Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com.

Outsmarting Dry Skin

Any item entering my house, no matter how small, requires the most careful consideration regarding design, tactility, and function. Seems anal, but this is how I've always operated. When I was 8 years old and had to pick a dress to perform piano in with the Honolulu Symphony, nothing off-the rack would do so I picked a pattern and worked with a seamstress. No kidding -- my poor Mother. Before I had a kid though, no one ever fought me on my choices. I was head of Chez Nuy. That said, for A's first pair of mittens, I searched high and low for the best pair to combat the cold air, and the dry skin it was inflaming on her hands. When they arrived at our door, I put the selection on A and to my dismay, she freaked out. A hated the mittens -- everything about them. Our, my mitten meet-and-greet had gone awfully awry: my fashion remedy for her chapped hands was a no-go.

When we're out and about, I try to keep A's hands tucked into her oversized, Polo jacket. But when she's snacking, playing Ring Around the Rosy, or negotiating the jungle gym, her little mitts are inevitably exposed to the chilly NYC air, and the area below her knuckles suffers. Like her hair, A's skin is dry, and the winters are typically challenging -- what with the overheated, moistureless apartments and the icy, outside air. And maybe it's sympathy-symptoms, but my own hands, on and around the knuckles have also been raw and chapped, similar to A's. There are days when the pinkness of my knuckles are akin to the prettiest spring blush, but blush doesn't, and shouldn't burn! 

A's intense dry skin can act out, particularly in arid conditions, expressing itself as mild atopic dermatitis, per her pediatrician. Her case is far from severe, but when it's intense it has caused tiny bumps to rise on her body (concentrated on her stomach, her bum -- areas where clothing is most often rubbing against her skin), and caused discomfort to the point where she'll itch the problem areas until chafing occurs. 

It's important to remember a few basics when dealing with mild baby eczema / atopic dermatitis: Use a humidifier (here's Hello Kitty one, $39), apply moisturizer daily and liberally, don't wash the skin too often with drying soaps (use pH balanced soaps like Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser ($6), which is safe for babies), and alternate washes with soap by just cleansing your child with water.  

I was feeling victorious because I had recently gotten both pairs of hands at Chez Nuy in tip top shape -- mostly due to the religious application of lotion (here's a luxurious one I love for Mom by Rescue Beauty, $42) and lots of Vaseline before bedtime. Then today, while we were out in the tundra of the city's early February blizzard making snowmen, a friend of mine offered A a pair of white toddler gloves akin to Minnie Mouse's or an old-fashioned waiter's. Gasp! Something I never would've picked.

But A kept them on, flashing me a satisfied smile as she gathered some snow, fully-gloved: Yes, mama, I like these!

Dry Skin 1-2-3:

1) Vaseline ($5): This inexpensive classic that I use daily for A, is a fantastic heal-all and works well for both baby and mom. Put it on the raw areas (works great for diaper rashes and chapped lips too) when you and/or your kid goes to bed. You'll see a difference overnight.

2) Mustela Dermo-Pediatrics Stelatopia Moisturizing Cream ($19): After trying many, this was the only lotion that made A's tiny, dry skin bumps go away. 

3) Aveeno Baby Soothing Bath Treatment ($5): You can use this a few times a week to soothe dry, itchy skin (and it also works for diaper rash). Just make sure to have your child soak for at least ten to fifteen minutes in the treatment.

UPDATE (March 21, 2010):

Try Vanicream. A and I have been having fantastic results with it in the last few weeks. It is possibly the most irritant-free moisturizer I have found so far, and highly absorbent.

-- N.C.

Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com. 

Baby Curls 101

My daughter, sporting the natural curls I always coveted.

All my life I dreamt of having curls. There was this girl at the high school I went to in Honolulu who had the most sensational head of sun-kissed, blond spirals -- the Shirley Temple of the Surf. I was supremely envious and looked in the mirror at my sorry, straight hair, wishing my hair gene would spontaneously mutate. Then I gave birth to a mixed-race daughter with natural corkscrews and was suddenly faced with the reality of curly hair: tangles, crazy bed-head, even mini dreadlocks! I realized beautiful curls were going to take a little know-how.

My daughter has my fine hair, but with quite a curl. Her ringlets can be gorgeous but as all moms know, babies spend a lot of time with their heads rubbing the backs of pillows, strollers, rugs, etc., and that means a lot of whacked-out hair. I started approaching moms on the playground and asked them about their curlicue routines. And though I got some advice overall, I was surprised to discover that most were still miffed, even if they had curls themselves as to what to do with the little mane, in an easy, manageable way.

The only case I heard of where the curls (and routine) were impeccable involved a mother conditioning her toddler daughter's hair every morning with Pantene. The kicker being that after detangling her hair with a comb, she would let the Pantene sit and set for five minutes under a shower cap before rinsing. The spirals, as a result: picture-perfect 24-7. But both my busy toddler and lifestyle demand a simpler routine.

After a few months of trial and error I figured out what worked: the bottom line being that we wash and condition only twice a week, with some minor maintenance in between. And with this the tangles are minor, and my daughter's hair is healthy and clean. And most importantly, we have more time to luxuriate in our lives.


Easy Curls 1-2-3:

1) Shampoo and Condition: Twice a week

My daughter's hair is on the dry side. As a rule, the curlier the hair, the less natural moisture it maintains. Oil from the scalp travels more easily down the straight hair's shaft than it does with curly hair. Early on, I was washing her hair on a daily basis. Then I realized it was frizzing, had way too much static, and was matting more as a result. Washing and conditioning twice a week provides the right amount of time saved as well as maintaining the right balance of natural oils.

For washing, we’ve been enjoying an organic, tearless, and moisturizing shampoo ($9) and conditioner ($10) by It’s a Curl. For wet-detangling, I let the conditioner sit in the hair for a minute or so while she plays in the tub. Then I take my fingers, or you can use a plastic needle brush like our Hello Kitty one ($5), and gently remove all the tangles before rinsing.

2) Dry Combing: 2-3 times a week

In between the washes it's important to provide some light maintenance to keep the knots at bay and the spirals bouncy. You will need a wide-toothed comb (try this one by Conair, $2) and a detangling product, or you can just opt for water in a spray bottle. We alternate between these detangling products: Fairy Tales Static Free Leave-in Detangling Spray ($9) and Johnson’s No More Tangles Leave-in Conditioner ($5), although I admit to preferring the slightly milder scent of the latter.

3) Styling: If you want, when you want!

For those days you want to amp up those corkscrews, try this Hair Milk ($12: 4 oz.) by Carol’s Daughter, which is safe for baby but designed for moms so you can both use it. And as a rule, don’t apply styling products to the roots, just toward the ends or you'll end up with greasy hair.

Bonus tip!  You can convert blah waves into spirals: Wrap a section of hair around your index finger like a telephone cord while rubbing the product in with your thumb and index finger.

-N.C. 

Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com.

Dance Off!

Sometimes looking good isn’t about the amount of sleep you get, the lack of bags under your eyes, or perfect hair. It may even be one of those jeans-fit-great-days, but your kid is cranky, you’ve had a bad phone call, and lunch at the high-chair was a disaster. That’s when you need a healthy thing called an at-home dance off.

Almost everyday, around the toddler witching hour (4-6 pm), I crank up the stereo and smooth out my daughter A’s whines with some rejuvenating hip and ass shaking. My favorite song of the moment for rump-shakin’ is Beyoncé's (with Jay-Z)  "Crazy in Love."  A may only be 17 months old but she's half black and will need to learn to move that ass at some point so why not start now?

I grab A’s hands and we boogie: twirling, skipping, jumping and she'll even roll on the floor. It dawns on me that I haven't smiled all day and suddenly I'm giggling as I see her push out her tiny rump trying to copy me. Like magic, all the tension that’s been building up inside of me slips away. And when I look at the living room mirror I see a happy me. We’ll even take it to the dinner table and keep bouncing and head-bopping while we eat. This kind of Happy is something you definitely can't buy in a bottle and apply.

During these moments, A and I are in our own little physical and free world. I’m teaching her that if you truly indulge in the beauty of the moving moment, wherever it takes you, it’s going to be good.

It’s easy to get trapped in the gripping schedule your life and kids command, and forget how important it is to break out once in a while and just celebrate. To smile. To bust-a-move. To let go.

Get Down 1-2-3:

1. Earth, Wind & Fire: September

2. Justin Timberlake: Rock Your Body

3. Kylie Minogue: Love at First Sight

I want to hear from you! What is your favorite song to dance to at home? 

Note: Depending on the age of your child, you may want to listen to the lyrics first.

-N.C.

Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com.

Make-Up ABCs

Here is a beauty framework I’ve built through trial and error with my daughter that is literally as simple as her ABCs. Sure, there are times when she tries to pull my leggings off while I’m standing at the vanity. And other times when she’s so happy fiddling with my laptop sleeve as a hat that I can indulge in doing my entire face. If she does pitch a fit, I’ve learned to involve her in the process -- like handing her my not-so-nice eyelash curler to play with, which, not to worry, she waves around proudly, putting it no where near her eyes -- and I’m rewarded with one of her awesome smiles. It’s the snap recognition that we’re a team: ever-improvising and adjusting to the sometimes melodic, sometimes chaotic interruptions in life, together.


Make-Up 1-2-3:

These are the ABCs of easy make-up, and all of these steps shouldn’t take you more than a few minutes each.

A = Attractive BROWS. B = Bright EYES. C = Clean LIPS. Listed in order of importance, they are the main elements that define and amplify your face. Even if you only have time to pay attention to one of them you will see a rewarding difference.

1) A is for Attractive Brows
If all else fails with time I make sure my brows are done. Brows shape your eyes and frame your face and expression. I won’t get into heavy shaping issues like tweezing or waxing because that takes more than a few minutes, but you can do a lot to shape your brows without actually removing any hair.

Take a brow brush (here’s one for $1 by e.l.f., or if you don’t have one just use your fingers) and brush or stroke upwards and outwards toward the temples starting from the inner brow. The closer you get toward the temples the more outward, rather than upward, you should brush or stroke. If your brows are sparse like mine, you can fill them softly with a brow pencil remembering to blend afterward, either with an eyebrow brush or your finger. Here are two options for brow pencils: Shu Uemura Hard Formula ($22), or Cover Girl Brow/Eye pencil ($3).

Tip: To set groomed brows, you can brush them with a brow gel. Try these: Christian Dior Brow Fix ($18) or Cover Girl Clear Eye Mascara ($5). And, using a brow gel eliminates the need to brush separately, because you’ll be setting the brow-hairs by brushing with the brow gel wand.

2) B is for Bright Eyes

The simple act of curling your lashes adds surprising width to your windows. For those who don’t know what to do with an eyelash curler, don’t worry, it’s easy. Just take the curler and press the curler up against your upper eyelids so that the lips surround the base of your lashes; then squeeze the scissor-like handles for a good ten seconds. Optionally, you can repeat, but this time place the curler's lips around the middle of the lash to round out the whole curl. The bottom lashes don't get curled. Take a look at the difference it makes:

Here are two great curler options: Shu Uemura ($25), my favorite,  or you can also try this one by Tweezerman ($11).

After curling comes a couple coats of mascara, which takes you from blah to awake in a matter of a few strokes. That little bit of brown or black on your lashes will open up and brighten your eyes. You can’t go wrong with Maybelline for a great drugstore mascara -- I'm currently enjoying the Stiletto ($8), or if you’re willing to spend a little more you can try Imju Fiberwig ($24) which is particularly smudge-proof.

You don’t have to do both steps if you don’t want to. Whatever you can manage will embolden your eyes. Just remember to curl before applying mascara or you could damage your lashes. 

3) C is for Clean Lips

All you need is a bit of tinted lip balm or a subtle lip gloss. Think peach, berry, or nude colors -- not vampy dark browns or overly glittery glosses. A hint of color on your lips can light up your entire face. It makes certain that if you’ve got blemishes, unlike an intensely colored lipstick, you won’t have multiple shades of reds, purples, or oranges clashing on your face, and you're allowed the freedom of a quick and blind application. Try this tinted lip conditioner by M.A.C. Cosmetics ($15) -- I always have it in my pocket.

-N.C.

Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com.

A Pick-Me-Up Shoot

In early December, I got rejected three times. I won’t go into detail on the whys or hows but I got three Nos. It was just one of those weeks where a couple of doors came flying in my face. Not all the way per se but enough so that by the third time it stung. Sulking in self-pity with a rambunctious toddler is a bad idea so I dug deep to find a portrait of a positive self. Christmas was coming and I had no holiday cards, décor, or presents. It was the perfect time for a spur-of-the-moment photo shoot -- a little healing for me and a quick remedy for the lack of prep.

I quickly dolled myself up with make-up and gave my hair a bit of extra love. I grabbed a simple turquoise top and pulled on some seventies-inspired leggings that were black with serious sheen. A’s hair was cleaned up into a high ponytail. Her outfit: a sweater with a big red bow on the chest by the Japanese designer Undercover with striped tights and a mini. We were camera-ready.

Most of the time I feel like A’s eyes are on me all day to do something entertaining for her. Doing a photo shoot at home can be loads of fun and it takes the focus off of you for those 15-30 minutes as the camera takes charge. You can both act silly -- play and pose together on equal footing. All it takes is a self-timer button.

The trick is to take enough pictures. Take at least 25 or 30, or more if you can. If your camera has a Continuous-or Burst-shoot mode, where the camera will take several photos one after another in one click, that works with the self-timer mode, use it. Make sure you wear something nice and make yourself up for the shoot. If you fully took advantage of being creative and enjoyed yourself you’ll be pleasantly surprised at how joyful you look (and of course your kid too).

It’s good to be in the moment and celebrate, if even for a few minutes, the art of just breaking into a grin.



Perfect Pose 1-2-3:

1) Look straight into the camera, like you would with someone you were having a great conversation with. The more relaxed and natural you are the more the lens will pick up on that.

2) Dress simply in form-fitting clothes (as the camera does tend to add 10 pounds) and stay away from busy backgrounds.

3) Make sure your make-up is fresh but keep it clean and streamlined: no intense colors, e.g., use a colored lip gloss not a raging red lipstick because digital cameras often misrepresent colors.

Bonus: Take a look here at how the pros do it.


 

-N.C.

Disclaimer: Nuy Cho has no affiliation to any of the beauty companies mentioned on www.nuybeauty.com.